Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 21 February 2011

image for The NBA West All-Stars Defeat The NBA East All-Stars 148-143 As MVP Kobe Bryant Scores 93 Points!
Kobe Bryant was awarded the game ball after he was named the NBA All-Star Games MVP. (Photo courtesy of Charles Barkley).

LOS ANGELES - The fans attending the 60th Annual NBA All-Star game at The Staples Center in Los Angeles definitely got their money's worth as they watched quite a point scoring exhibition.

After the California dust had settled the players from the West had defeated the Players from the East 148-143 behind the phenomenal ball handling and ball shooting of one of the NBA's best Kobe Bryant.

Bryant, along with George Lopez and Salma Hayek, recently became the spokespersons for the very popular California-based Mexican restaurant chain, Tacos, Tacos, and Mucho More Tacos.

The Los Angeles Lakers super star, who back in 2003 gave his wife, Vanessa, a $4 million ring so she would not divorce him, beat out LeBron James of the Miami Heat for the Most Valuable Player honors.

The man who wears number 24, scored 93 points, had 37 rebounds, 16 steals, 2 assists, and at half time he also had 3 hot dogs, 1 plate of nachos, and 2 Diet Dr. Peppers.

After the game NBA Commissioner David Stern presented Bryant with the coveted NBA All-Star Game MVP trophy, along with the keys to a 2011 Lamborghini Murcielago ($395,000), the keys to a 2011 RV ($250,000), a year's supply of Ben & Jerry's Chubby Hubby Ice Cream, and $85,000 in cash.

Bryant told Sports Territory Magazine's Atwood "Overtime" McSparrow that he was going to take $10,000 of the $85,000 cash and donate it to his neighbor David Crosby, member of the 70s band Crosby, Stills, Nash, & Young.

Kobe said that he wanted for Crosby to go on some kind of a 24/7 diet plan. He noted that Crosby has really been putting on the weight lately and he is just about as heavy as Kirstie Alley who weighs 409.

Bryant pointed out that David is actually even starting to resemble Ms. Alley except for the fact that he has much frizzier hair, a Fu Manchu moustache, musical ability, and a penis.

Sports Territory Magazine is reporting that LeBron James of the East team was so upset at losing the game and at not being chosen as the games MVP that he is seriously thinking about filing a lawsuit on grounds of Nolo Non Sequitur Basketitus Quid Per Se.

Kobe Bryant stated that he has already discussed it with his wife, and she has agreed with him to give the $250,000 RV to his lawyer who helped clear his name in regards to that horrible Colorado assault charge from 2003.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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