Written by Dr. Billingsgate
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Topics: Ass, Proctology

Friday, 18 February 2011

Harvard trained protologist, Dr. Thaddeus Colonato, today reported that he successfully enlarged the business end of a patient's alimentary canal from a substandard 10 guage opening to something that would allow a 12 gauge turd to pass without micro markings.

Anyone who has ever squeezed off a turd that was so large that the anal spincter took two days to recover, knows the potential value of this new procedure.

Dr. Colonato, who also has an Engineering degree from MIT, claims that he got his idea from observing a common corkscrew in action. By attaching this device to a Black and Decker 3/4 Horsepower drill, he found that he could easily rebore a bunghole with little or no discomfort in approximately 30 seconds.

Assholes from across the United States are now calling for appointments.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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