Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 12 February 2011

image for The Cleveland Cavaliers May Soon Become The Cancun Cavaliers
Cancun's Green Guacamole Basketball Arena is patterned exactly after Madison Square Garden.

CANCUN, Mexico - A few weeks ago LeBron James of The Miami Heat had become so upset with his ex-team the Cleveland Cavaliers organization as well as with their fans that he actually threatened to buy the team and move them to Baghdad, Iraq.

Well needless to say that plan fell through because there was no way that the NBA commissioner would have allowed the NBA teams who have the Cavaliers on their schedule to travel to Baghdad, the "Human Bomb" capital of the world.

Recently the Cavaliers lost 26 games in a row tying the all time record for any team in any sport including basketball, baseball, football, hockey, and pro bobsledding as well.

The Cavaliers record as of February 11, 2010 stood at 9-45.

Sport Territory Magazine reporter Atwood "Overtime" McSparrow has broken the story that Cleveland Cavaliers owner Danny "Boy" Gilbert has been in talks with a Senor X, a spokesperson representing Yucatan, Mexico's Green Guacamole Drug Cartel about purchasing the Cavaliers and moving them down to Cancun.

Senor X said that his 'Organization' is prepared to pay double what the team is worth. He added that the team would play in the newly completed, state-of-the-art 100,000 seat Green Guacamole Basketball Arena.

He further stated that the team would retain the name Cavaliers and play as The Cancun Cavaliers for the current season but that the name for the 2011-2012 season would be changed to The Cancun Caballeros.

Senor X also pointed out that each Cleveland Cavalier player would receive his regular salary plus he would be allowed a $100,000 moving expense bonus and a $20,000 goodwill gesture for relocating.

And on top of that each players wife or girlfriend would receive a $100,000 gift certificate to the most expensive jewelry store in all of Mexico, La Casa Mama de Bling Bling Jewelry Store.

Senor X smiled and added, "And eesh Cleeblun player wheel also geet a brand new 2011 fully loaded Lexus plus season teekets to dee Mrs. Pancho Villa Commemorative Bullring wish ease de only domed bullring in dee entire earth."

Sport Territory Magazine is reporting that Cleveland players Ramon Sessions (#3), Alonzo Gee (#33), and Jamario Moon (#15) are so damn excited at the prospective move that they have all gone onto the Internet and started learning conversational Spanish.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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