Written by grimbo
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Thursday, 10 February 2011

image for SPL Reconstruction Shock Claims

Reports are coming out from various unnamed sources that the oft used emotional and financial arguments being put forward on the subject of league reconstruction are being accompanied by some distinctly unsavoury methods of persuasion.

Details of various forms of torture that evoke memories of some of the worst excesses of the Iraq invasion are surfacing.

One of the most common techniques being used to win the argument is Waterboarding - that is where one or more chairmen are threatened with the ultimate nightmare scenario.....being served with water in the boardroom pre and post match instead of the traditional 1962 Macallan or 18 year old Glenmorangie.

Another type of torture is Sleep Deprivation where a chairman is kept awake in a brightly lit room and forced for hours on end to listen to the Collected Speeches of Sepp Blatter.

There is also the frightening threat of Severe Disfigurement where the victim is left alone in a room where all the walls are plastered with photos of Franck Ribery.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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