Written by grimbo
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Thursday, 10 February 2011

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Colin Montgomerie is back in the bad books after a foul mouthed outburst in the second round of the San Marino Open.

Monty was furious at three putting the eighteenth hole, blaming his lapse on loud music coming from one of the nearby hospitality tents.

Monty finished his round with a double bogey to leave him with a one-under-par 71.

"This should never have happened in the first place. Is this a party or a golf tournament?" he shouted at the tournament director Miguel Vidaor. Vidaor responded by exhorting the surly Scot to "chill out aye , go with the flow and groove on down with the posse".

Montgomerie then declined to speak to waiting reporters after handing in his scorecard. He later issued a statement in which he declared that " I will no longer talk to any reporter unless they are English speaking, refer to me as The Boss and bow and tug their forelock anytime they address me. I truly believe that this deferential treatment is the very least I deserve".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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