Written by Proffitt
Print this

Tuesday, 25 January 2011

image for 'Gray' Tuesday for Andy as he is sacked by Sky
No football just cooking

Andy Gray has been sacked by Sky after his somewhat sexist comments about a bird expected to officiate at a football match!

Yes, you may need to read that first line twice and yes, it does say the words bird (implying female), officiate and football in the same sentence.

Gray, 55 was caught chatting off camera with co presenter Richard Keys. He was heard to say how shit women are at football, the offside rule in particular and life in general. He went on to lambast poor old Karen Brady of almost no fame at all by recommending Karen do something useful like putting on the kettle.

Tonight Gray was unrepentant on hearing the news. He said: 'I was getting bored at Sky and they needed a patsy what with the uproar etc so it looks like it's me.' Since hearing the news this morning Gray has reportedly been offered work at Channel 5 who are putting together a show to rival Loose Women, called 'Why Do Women Have Small Feet?'

'They have asked me to be a permanent fixture on the panel,' said Gray. 'They already have John McCririck the chauvinist horse racing pundit, Stan Colleymore the Ulrika basher and me. I think the message will be about how women should have our dinner ready after a hard day at the office, complain less and generally be seen and not heard.'

We informed Andy that the latter phrase applied to children but he simply said, 'don't get me started on those little fuckers.'

Make Proffitt's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 multiplied by 5?

9 6 15 20
53 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more