Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 4 January 2011

image for Two More Women File Lawsuits Against Brett Favre: It Looks Like "Frisky" Favre Just Keeps On Stepping In It
The president of The Brett Favre Fan Club, Hedwig Patchford shown at their last meeting.

NEW YORK CITY - One of the NFLs greatest quarterbacks of all-time just seems to keep on stepping in a pile of dog do every time he turns around.

And this time Brett "Frisky" Favre, 63, is being sued by two former New York Jets massage therapists Christina "Fingers" Scavo and Shannon "Fingers" O'Toole.

The two ex-Jets employees confided to Gingerbread Matchaletti, a reporter for The Right Coast Illustrated Revue that Mr. Favre had sent each employee text messages that were laden with four letter words which included [EXPLETIVES DELETED BY EDITOR].

Matchaletti disclosed that she had obtained copies of the text messages from a highly placed, inside, unnamed source for $47 and that she cannot recall ever hearing about anyone writing nastier words than "Frisky" had written.

Ginger pointed out that one of the text messages to Scavo mentioned the fact that "Frisky," as she nicknamed the infamous quarterback, told her that he wanted to count every single freckle on both of her hooters.

He also wrote that he wanted to look at her labia majora and compare it with photos he had seen of Lindsay Lohan's freckled muffin.

O'Toole confessed that she was shocked when she read that "Frisky" asked her if he could nickname her hooha 'the jetty donut.' O'Toole rejected his idea telling him that an ex-boyfriend had already nicknamed it 'the pink palace.'

She added that he also texted her telling her that he had fantasized about her playing 'touch my tuna tickler' with his lap lizard.

Gingerbread even revealed that she grew up in a family of six boys all of whom grew up and joined the navy seals so they certainly had a pretty good working knowledge of vile, vulgar, and downright nasty words.

Favre has of course denied the allegations saying that at the point in time that Scavo and O'Toole say he texted them he was nursing a sore left index finger and a sore right index finger so there is no way in the world he could have sent the two women any text messages unless he had texted them using his pecker, which he swears he did not do.

In a non-related story. Clay Aiken has vehemently denied the rumors that he is straight.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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