Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 28 December 2010

image for Carlo Ancelotti Sacked!
John Terry wheels away after Ancelotti's sacking

The world of football was reeling this morning after Chelsea announced that they had sacked manager Carlo Ancelotti immediately after last night's crushing 3-1 defeat against Arsenal at the Emirates.

Ancelotti only took charge of the Blues in summer 2009. but a recent run of poor form had produced an amazing wave of bad sentiment from fans towards the Italian, and the Stamford Bridge board has now acted swiftly.

Last night's encounter with the Gunners was indicative of Chelsea's current slump; Alex Song put Arsenal ahead just before the break, and two more strikes just after it from Fabregas and Walcott put the match beyond the Blues. A consolation goal by Ivanovic was Chelsea's only response, and they have now won only once in their last eight games, with that victory coming against MSK Zilina (who?) in the Champions League.

They now lie in fourth, six points behind leaders Manchester United, having played one game more.

Ancelotti looked shocked as he appeared before reporters after the announcement. He said:

"I am surprised that I lasted so long. I think that too many queerly-named foreign managers come here on the back of a 'glittering' playing career back home, mediocre records as a manager of some half-decent outfit, and imagine that life here in the Premier League is going to be a doddle. It isn't, especially if you're not a very good manager, although I've heard people say that, with a club like this, their own grandmother should be able to manage it! Now, I'm going to go back to Italy and sun myself until the next gullible club come along and offer me another fortune."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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