Written by Skoob1999
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Monday, 13 December 2010

image for Ali Bullo's Kebab And Pizza Van On Standby For United v Arsenal Clash
Greasy Shit Here Innit Mate!

Local kebab and pizza van entrepreneur, Ali Bullo, has just confirmed that his flagship kebab and pizza van will be on standby for Manchester United's Premier League clash with Arsenal at Old Trafford tonight.

United versus Arsenal has been something of a heated contest in recent years, most notably in the McClaregate incident which erupted into a mass brawl and resulted in both clubs being deducted points.

And unforgettably with Ruud Van Nistelrooy's last gasp penalty miss, which resulted in disgraceful scenes which culminated in Sir Alex Ferguson being pelted with pizza slices by jubilant Arsenal players.

Arsene Wenger apparently did not see the incident.

But should there be a repeat of the pizza battle, Ali Bullo is well prepared to supply the ammunition. He told us here at Skoob Sports News:

"If them want throw pizza, I have slices with triple mozzarella, pineapple slices, lot of tomato, and extra virgin olive oil - very sloppy. Good for throwing as missile. Will stick to nice football manager posh suit like shit to blanket innit."

Arsenal's Samir Nasri has been reported as saying that Arsenal have nothing to fear from a Manchester United team, now shorn of Cristiano Ronaldo and Carlos Tevez, something Darren Fletcher, the United midfielder hotly disputed.

Fletcher has denied being a hatchet man, and it's thought that if any Arsenal player accuses him of being such, he'll kick the person concerned's fucking head in.

Skoob Sports News tips United for this one, because Arsenal are still too lightweight.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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