Written by Deafo
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Topics: Cricket, Ashes

Sunday, 5 December 2010

image for Cricketing world turned upside down as Australia turn into England
'Vintage England'

The Cricketing world has been turned upside down as Australian fans begin praying for rain as they watch their Ashes opponents disappear over the hills whilst their team toils on wickets flatter than a decade old bottle of happy shopper lemonade.

The dramatic shift is in direct contrast to the nineties where English cricket fans took to supporting the rain as their team was shafted through orifices they never knew existed by any country with a population exceeding fifteen.

A member of the English touring party who wished to remain nameless said,'These desperate actions were previously the preserve of followers of a shambolically assembled set of reprobates from the 1990's.'

'No, not the Happy Mondays, it was something termed loosely as the English Cricket team. These boys had become accustomed to collapsing under pressure, and collapse they did, with all the futile inevitability of a thalidomide constructed tree house.'

'Its seems the shoe has now been very firmly planted on the other foot.'

'There's a running joke in the dressing room suggesting Devon Malcolm had been secretly coaching the Aussie bowlers in the art of pie chucking.'

'But the Australians haven't just taken to copying our level of performance from the nineties, they have now also taken to copying our weather conditions in order to get them off the hook.'

Australian bowling coach Troy Cooley said the only reason he was praying for rain was to ensure his free roaming horses had something to drink while he was away from home.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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