Written by Mr Spinks
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Monday, 29 November 2010

Liverpool left back Paul Konchesky has been voted the luckiest bloke alive.

Konchesky 29, who followed boss Roy Hodgson from Fulham to Liverpool in the summer, is said to have agreed with the outcome of vote. He excitedly told reporters, "This is the proudest moment of my life, at first I couldn't believe Liverpool actually wanted me, and now this!". He went on to say, "Now I think I can relate to Stevie and Carra's stories about triumph in Istambul".

One voter told us, "I've survived cancer three times, and Paul is miles luckier than me. It goes to show that you don't necessarily have to have talent to play for a big club these days".

Konchesky is expected to auction his trophy online and donate all proceeds to charity.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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