Written by Karen Fish
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Monday, 22 November 2010

image for Toddler Plunges from Lakers Box onto Kim Kardashian Implants Fine

This is one boy who should have been stapled to his seat. Last night at the Staples Center Kim Kardashian was sitting courtside with Halle Berry's baby daddy Gabriel Aubry watching the Los Angeles Lakers blow away the Golden State Warriors.

Pau Gasol took a pass from Kobe Bryant and 2 year old publicity seeker Johann Bellerophon flew out of a Lakers' box and plunged 50 feet onto the startled Kim Kardashian, knocking her to the floor.

Pau Gasol stopped and said to Kim K, "Do you mind, I have a perfect game going here."

The 2 year old boy was lying on top of Kim Kardashian moving his arms, legs and head when paramedics removed him and put him into an ambulance.

Los Angeles Police Department Juvenile Division spokesman Graham Jackson said "Somehow the toddler went over the protective glass wall and flew to the floor, where he suffered severe head trauma when his head came into contact with a hard plastic material."

Kim Kardashian said, "I was kinda knocked out and I just felt this guy flailing around on top of me. I have not ever had plastic surgery. I have had a size C since I was 11 years old. I rely on a great supportive bra. All the butt implant rumors are just so not true and now just silly to me."

The paramedics pried the toddler's mouth off of Kim's left nipple and rushed him to the hospital where he was treated for a milk overdose.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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