Written by SpaceElevator
Print this

Friday, 19 November 2010

image for Bronko Nagurski's Family calls NCAA "a bunch of hypocrite Nancy-Boys" for playing away from Wrigley Field Brick Wall
Safety First

(Chicago, Illinois) - On the eve of a Big Ten novelty game between Northwestern and Illinois, the family of Bronko Nagurski is criticizing the decision to point the playing field away from the right-field wall.

"A bunch of hypocrite Nancy-Boys is what I call 'em," said family spokesperson and great-grandson Bronko Nagurski IV from the Bronko Nagurski Museum in International Falls, Minnesota.

"My great-grandpappy routinely drove his head through that wall when he played the game. We believe they should just let the players play the game... maintaining the purity of the sport as it was meant to be played... instead of constantly interfering with all of their fancy 'rules-and-regulations'."

Officials decided this week to avoid playing toward the brick wall due to safety concerns. Said one: "We are all in favor of letting these kids destroy their bodies by hurtling towards each other at breakneck speeds. But we draw the line at running into brick walls."

Make SpaceElevator's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 plus 4?

2 22 9 6
39 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more