Written by Ellis Ian Fields

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Wednesday, 20 October 2010

image for Wayne Rooney Exclusive: It's Synchronised Swimming!
Wayne's a water baby!

We can exclusively reveal that it's not money or the attraction of another club that is pulling Wayne Rooney away from Manchester United.

He wants to perform in Britain's synchronised swimming team at the 2012 Olympics in London!

The shocking news emerged last night after the Manchester Utd manager Sir Alex Ferguson had emotionally revealed that Rooney no longer wished to play for the Red Devils.

And although the swimming plans will mean the end of Rooney's career as an England striker, he sees his ambition as still being patriotic.

An insider said: "Wayne has been taken by the beauty and grace of synchronised swimming since watching the last Olympics in China.

"And a certain lady of his acquaintance was involved in the sport and he became more interested. His loss of form for England and United is indicative of his feeling that football is too physical and brutal.

"He's confident that with a serious training schedule and the right people on board, he can be ready for the London games.

"Wayne seriously believes that he can offer his country much more as a swimmer than a footballer."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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