Steven Gerrard has recently revealed how he aims to cap off his footballing career: with ambitions of winning the Premier League slowly and surely slipping down the drain.
Our interview panel attempted to interview Gary Lineker, who was too busy trying to exchange his model. Instead, we spoke to a 6 year old boy who was in the sweets shop.
"Gerrard's funny cos he's playing for a team that smell like poopy!" the 6 year old giggled intolerably, before being praised by his father: ex-manager Rafa Benitez.
"I taught him those words myself," a proud Rafa bragged, before claiming that "Gerrard will win a title. Unfortunately, it's going to be the 'Longest a player has gone without winning a title' Title!"
Either way, Stevie G. recently denied Rafa's comments on his Tweet feed.
'Eat that Rafa. Just won the title as Liverpool. Admittedly on the Xbox'.
Probably the closest he's gonna get to lifting up a cup this season. Especially now he can't go to any night clubs.