Written by IainB
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Monday, 27 September 2010

image for Commonwealth Games - India refuse to send a team
All that remains of the Weight Lifting arena

India are the latest country to pull their team out of the Commonwealth game in Delhi. This follows the high profile departures of Togo, Tonga and Trinidad and Tobasco citing inhuman conditions at the tournament.

With crumbling venues, unfinished athlete accommodation and the threat of terrorism and kidnap, team after team have pulled out of this year's competition that rivals the Olympics in terms of number events, if not number of teams, media coverage and most other measures.

Birdwanna Singh, head of travel for the Indian Commonwealth team, justified pulling out of a competition being held in their own country.

"Due to financial cut-backs, all the athletes are required to make their own way to Delhi, and I don't know if you've ever been to Delhi, but traffic there is a nightmare. This is nothing to do with the accommodation. Several of our team live outside Mumbai, and this accommodation is like the Paris Hilton to them. You've seen Slumdog Millionaire?"

Fachs Paypar, who has been in charge of construction of the various venues in the competition is adamant that the construction disaster is not of his making.

"We got some dodgy cement of some Polish bloke, didn't we?" he said. "It didn't mix right, did it? And when I rang the help-line number, I only bloody well got a call centre in Gainsborough, UK. Couldn't understand a bloody word they were saying, could I? And it cost me a fortune on me mobile, didn't it?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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