Written by Skoob1999
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Wednesday, 22 September 2010

image for Ferguson signs Scunthorpe Streaker
Fergie Fergie Sign Him Up!

Manchester United boss, Sir Alex of the Ferguson confirmed this morning that he has indeed signed up the streaker who invaded the pitch last night in United's 5-2 Carling Cup victory over Scunthorpe. (Or 'Scunny as the locals call it.)

The streaker appeared in the second half, halting play for a while as he evaded capture by stewards, prompting United fans to chant:

"Fergie, Fergie sign him up!"

So Sir Alex did. Armed with a bin bag full of used notes, a United official signed up the streaker in a police van outside the stadium.

"He's got amazing body swerve and balance," a United official said. "I reckon he's a snip at £1.2 million."

The streaker, a Scunthorpe local was said to be dead chuffed at being signed up by United and says he's really looking forward to knobbing loads of top quality Manchester night club totty - 'like what some of the other lads do.'

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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