Written by masterchev
Print this

Tuesday, 21 September 2010

image for Moyes defends tactics despite shit start to season
"Ok guys, if we all huddle like this, they DEFINITELY won't score a goal"

Everton Manager David Moyes is currently experiencing the worst start to the season in twelve years, but he still sticks by his tactics.

The manager, notorious these days for developing the efficient 5-5-0 formation, claims he knew what he was doing when they recently lost 1-0 to newly promoted Newcastle.

"I think it was an alright game myself. I love how defensive we got... after they scored that goal. Yeah, they didn't score in the second half did they?" Moyes added happily as he examines the chalkboard.

Moyes has recently received a lot of stick for signing young gun Jermaine Beckford. The manager also insists that Yakubu is worth the price of an Everton player... despite missing in the World Cup for Nigeria.

"We keep trying to feed the Yak, but he just won't score anymore. Although we fed him so much a few seasons ago, the doctors complained he may have a high blood pressure. So we've dieted him down a bit,"

"As for the 5-5-0 formation, it allows us to effectively dominate the midfield. Johnny (Heitinga) can play more up front, and allow our Spanish Magician Mikky to come back and defend. Everybody's happy!"

Speculation suggests Beckford will be dropped to goal this weekend to allow Tim Howard the chance to play up front on his own. Will Beckford FINALLY score for Everton? We shall see!

Make masterchev's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 multiplied by 3?

1 25 20 12
56 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more