Written by Bill Licks
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Monday, 20 September 2010

image for Football fan apologises to footballer
The shock of being told it looked like Lee Bowyer was too much for this rodent

A West Bromwich Albion fan has apologised to Birmingham City's Lee Bowyer after verbally abusing him during the Baggies 3-1 victory over the Blues.

The incident happened after Bowyer was substituted towards the end of the match when the fan is believed to have called the midfielder 'a meerkat faced cunt.'

'Lee was almost in tears' said City manager Alex Mcleish. 'He's a quiet, sensitive lad who never gets into any trouble and he hasn't said one swear word since I've known him.'

'He was just hoping to have a nice little chat with the fan about his performance and to listen to some advice on how he could improve his game. Being told you look like that irritating rat off those annoying insurance comparison website adverts is not constructive criticism in my book.'

The fan immediately saw how upset Bowyer looked and approached a steward straightaway to ask if she could issue an apology. The steward asked the fan to write down the apology on the back of a pack of Silk Cut which was later found discarded in a urinal covered in piss.

Chief executive of the PFA, Gordon Taylor said afterwards, 'It's about time fans started to apologise to players after the amount of abuse they have to take on the pitch. At the end of the day footballers are just people like you and me, trying to make a living by doing the job they're paid to do.'

'Just because they over indulge in prostitutes, have sex with their teammate's wives and photograph each other's cocks on their mobile phones doesn't mean fans can ritually take the piss out of them.'

'However Lee Bowyer does look like he should be sticking his head out of a hole in an African desert so on this occasion the abuse was totally justified.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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