Written by IainB
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Monday, 20 September 2010

image for Rolf Harris sparks cricket feud
England will win the Ashes? ROFL!

A slight typographic error from Rolf Harris has inadvertently increased tension between England and Australia ahead of the Ashes.

The genial Aussie painter, entertainer and wobble-board player heard of the England team's injury problems, losing Graham Onions to a back injury and Andrew Flintoff pulling out of international cricket due to persistent knee problems. Being a big cricket fan, and wanting to see the best teams put out by both sides, Harris thought he was showing sympathy when he sent an email to the England Cricket captain, Alistair Cook.

The Spoof has managed to get hold of this email (don't ask, I got scraped knees going through the conservatory window). It seemed simple enough:

Dear Alistair, as you know I'm a big Ashes fan, so I am passing on my sympathy over your recent injuries that makes any win by England extremely unlikely. ROFL.

Rolf has apologised, stating that he wasn't rolling on the floor laughing, but merely mistyped his name. However, cricket chiefs at Lords believe that this is goading by Antipodean Crooner, and have banned the playing any of his songs in the changing room ahead of the matches.

"This is out and out intimidation," said Cook in an interview yesterday. "As to the journo who came in through the conservatory window, you knocked over my Mother In Law's Tongue I'd been growing for twenty years, you git."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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