Written by KendoMonkey
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Topics: Government, Sport

Wednesday, 16 July 2003

image for Hopping good for the soul
Everybody's trying it!

Government officials are said to be considering new plans to make hopping into a national sport and past-time. Hopping has spent many years on the side-line as a childrens game in the form of hop-scotch. However, studies have shown that not only is hopping good for strengthening the muscles around the ankle (muscles in the group of polymucoasytheratical-haracarabarbarantis), that it also benefitted the human soul and generally made people 34% more affable.

"Hopping is something I think everyone can enjoy," said Politician, Sue Granger. "At the moment, people tend to hop with one foot following the other...which you probably know as walking. Walking is an absolutely moronic and stupid thing and should probably be banned. Hopping is the thing of the twenty-first century."

Doctor, Karlos Merembay disagrees:

"I think it's madness. All that pressure on your ankle-muscles is bad news for anyone. I recommend wearing moon-boots if you're going to partake in this nonsense."

The government is set to table the motion for the creation of a "National Hopping Day" sometime later this week. However, any vote is likely to be quashed upon reaching the house of lords, where if they tried to hope it would break their ankles.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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