Written by Noshing Mink
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Sunday, 22 August 2010

image for Blind fans watch blind footballers in blind world cup
One player tries to tackle team mate

Thousands of blind fans piled into a football stadium in London to watch England play China in the blind football world cup.

The ball has hundreds of tiny ball bearings inside so that players can hear it. The pitch is smaller than a regular sized pitch, the goals are also smaller and fans are asked not to cheer, since the players rely on sound to tell the position of the ball.

However, there was no risk of fans cheering, since all the fans were blind and couldn't see anything. Indeed, several fans were found to be facing the wrong way and had to be turned around by helpful stewards. Some fans sipped their neighbour's drink or ate their neighbour's snacks by mistake.

The referee and linesmen were sighted and showed great patience as players sometimes ran in the wrong direction or attempted to kick the ball into their own team's net. When one player accidentally ran towards the changing rooms, a linesman lassoed him back with a rodeo rope.

One fan later said, "I didn't know what the hell was going on or who won, but I did have a nice day out, and I got to have a cola and a hot dog that I didn't pay for."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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