Councillor Nathan D'Stallion, 48, had some bad news for island residents on Wednesday.
"It's sad news for the Isle of Wight today," he said, "as we have received notification from FIFA that we are not going to be the hosts for the 2018 World Cup."
D'Stallion had made a cheeky bid for the prestigious competition, separate from the mainland. Whilst countries like Spain and England had put together multimillion pound bids showing off the facilities and stadiums across the country, D'Stallion had taken pictures of the pitches at Newport, Ventnor, Ryde and Yarmouth and dropped them into a Powerpoint document that he emailed at no cost to the tax payer.
"We are quite disappointed," said D'Stallion. "I believe that the facilities we can offer visiting teams and fans are second to none. The Premier Inn at Ryde is a superb hotel, and Newport offers everything that a modern city can offer, such as a Subway and a Marks and Spencers. With the island being so small, there would be none of this travelling and altitude change that has marred the South African competition, with all the pitches a mere fifteen minutes drive from each other."
One of the reasons that the FIFA gave was the lack of capacity at any of the grounds. With Newport's ground certified for five hundred, and Ventnor for fifty, they felt that there was insufficient space for the tens of thousands of fans who would want to watch the match. D'Stallion feels that FIFA is using this as an excuse rather than a reason.
"I think FIFA have a thing against small islands," he said. "They rejected the Maldives too."