Written by Skoob1999
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Tuesday, 6 July 2010

image for Manchester City Sign Cristiano Ronaldo's Baby For £120 Million
Ali - Offspring Never Emulated Him.

Ever determined to pip their illustrious neighbours at the post, the 'noisy neighbours' of Manchester City announced last night that Cristiano Ronaldo's baby has been signed up.

For £120 million. Oh, we already said that, did we?

City fought off rival bids from Real Madrid, Barcelona, AC Milan, and Chelsea.

Cristiano Ronaldo was said to be delighted by the news, but has already expressed doubts as to whether the youngster will adjust to life in Manchester, what with the cold, and the wind and the rain, and that.

Cristiano was keen to play down reports that he has already arranged Bentley driving lessons in the vicinity of Manchester airport for his son.

Seasoned observers however, appear to have doubts. Sherbourne St John, a Basingstoke Town fan, told our reporter:

"It's not a wise move. I mean, Kenny Dalglish was a Liverpool legend, but I doubt that his daughter, Kelly, would have made it into the reserves. Jordi Cruyff wasn't a patch on his dad. It doesn't necessarily follow that just because somebody excels in a certain sporting discipline, that their offspring will too. I mean, look at Leila Ali, she's all right when it comes to fighting girls, but I very much doubt that she could ever have knocked George Foreman on his arse in the jungle, like her dad did. I just think City are wasting their megabucks on this one."

We tried to contact Cristiano Ronaldo for comment on this story but he was busy having another full body wax. And contemplating plastic surgery to correct that smug grin he always seems to have.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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