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Wednesday, 30 June 2010

image for Cristiano Ronaldo - Impotent
Oh God I Could Do Better Than That!

Like his former Manchester United team-mate, Wayne Rooney, Cristiano Ronaldo bowed out of the World Cup without making much of an impression.

There had been high hopes for the Iberian clash between Spain and Portugal, and to some extent, the game lived up to its billing. But not because of Cristiano Ronaldo and Portugal.

Ronaldo cut a forlorn figure as the Spaniards passed the ball around at will and the Portuguese got nary a sniff. The highlight of his performance coming when he fell on his arse and waved his arms about with a petulant expression on his face - only to be ignored by the referee.

Try as they might, the Portuguese team couldn't get the ball through to Ronaldo, leaving him alone, looking spent and impotent, whilst at the other end, David Villa scored the winner and seriously tested Eduardo, the Portugal keeper on more than one occasion.

And so the great Ronaldo was left to pack his bags and go home. Get back to what he does best - body waxing, sunbathing, crashing Bentleys, knobbing Peris Hulton, and posing in designer underpants.

Much the same as the England team really.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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