Written by Jaggedone
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Thursday, 24 June 2010

image for Germans promise to "Blitzkrieg" England with "Donner und Mein Kampf!"
Germans are taking Sunday's clash to the limit, they've even reissued Mein Kampf!

The old enemies are about to clash again and the Germans in their popular tabloid newspaper, Die Bild Zeitung, have issued the following warning to England's players and fans:

"Ve das Deutsche volk vill Blitzkrieg England vith our Messerschmits, U Boots and Mein Kampf, ve cannot lose and zere scheiss spaghetti eating manager vill be put up against ze wall, Sieg Heil!"

On hearing this England put its Spitfire squadrons on red alert and has promised never to give in to the Krauts as long as its not a penalty shoot out (they always win them)!

The build up to Sundays massive clash of the Titanic two is slowly getting out of control as German troops invaded Holland (well they are better than England and Germany together!) rush to the North Sea and are opening up WWII bunkers on the way!

The leader of the DFB (Deutsche Fussball Bund), Herr Fritzl Hilter-Bickenbauer, has vowed absolute victory over the arch enemies and will not surrender this time even if the US join England and win again (which they won't).

They will fight to the last man, hope there is a penalty shoot-out and release their latest weapons, adidas V2 bombs disguised as balls.

England goalkeeper David James has been fitted out with a bullet proof vest, tin hat and asbestos gloves, maybe they might help?

May ze best man vin, Achtung scheiss Englanders!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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