Written by Charpa93
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Saturday, 19 June 2010

image for Four North Korean Soccer Team Players Missing, More to Follow
Kim Jong Il Coming for Defectors Himself

Four players on the North Korean Soccer Team have gone missing. They were unaccounted for on Friday when they failed to show up for practice.

Rumors are swirling that the missing team members have defected and are seeking political asylum in the host country of South Africa. While they probably would have been happier had the World Cup been played in a country that had a larger Korean population such as America or the United Kingdom, so they could blend into the background more effectively, defection opportunities don't come along very often for North Koreans and many believe they are taking their chances as soon as they can.

It is believed that the North Korean actors who were paid to act as fans during North Korea's soccer matches may also be in on the defections and if so, instead of watching the players closely to deter any of them from going AWOL, may have also decided to run if given the opportunity.

If the rumors are true, the entire soccer team and its fans may turn missing within the weekend prompting Kim Jong Il to make good on his promise to declare war on any country that provides safe harbor to his citizens.

It is said that Kim Jong Il telepathically communicated this to the team's captain shortly before the captain also came up missing.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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