Written by Skoob1999
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Sunday, 13 June 2010

image for Robert Green Blames Hyenas For World Cup Howler
A Jubilant USA Fan In Rustenburg Last Night

It seems that England keeper Robert Green is blaming a pack of hyenas he spotted on a safari trip for his World Cup howler against the USA.

According to the West Ham man's friends, when Clint Dempsey unleashed that half hearted shot at him, he couldn't get the word 'HOWLER' out of his mind, and as the ball approached him, and because he wasn't wearing his thinking cap, he fumbled it and made a complete and utter arse of himself as he farted about trying to stop it from trickling over the line.

Green's friends are confident that he will recover his dignity and mental strength before England play Algeria in Cape Town next Friday. But they aren't all that confident that he'll retain his place in the starting line up.

"It was the thought of the hyenas and the howler monkeys and those bloody annoying vuvuzela trumpets," one friend told us. "He just couldn't get howling and howlers out of his head. Hence the howler. He's been a reliable lad lately, but all the wildlife here has distracted him a bit. You don't often get this kind of thing - howler monkeys and hyenas and stuff like that - in East London. But he'll deal with it."

One England fan leaving the stadium after the game said:

"All I'm saying is that, if he was so put off by having seen some hyenas, it's a good job he didn't see any hungry lions. Yes, he made a twit of himself, but he did make a good save in the second half."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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