The National Basketball Association is expected to levy a huge fine against a Dallas toddler whose first word, uttered last week, was "LeBron." The monumental moment in the Jenkins family was recorded by the baby's father, leading to some potential trouble for the apple of his eye.
NBA Commissioner David Stern said that the word, and the subsequent YouTube video, is tantamount to tampering.
"That video is completely unacceptable," Stern said in a statement written in the blood of kittens. "The fact is, if that baby-who isn't even that cute-wants to shoot her mouth off about a free agent, she can do it after July 1."
Roderick Jenkins, the baby's father and co-founder of the Facebook group "LeBron Iz Tha Beeeeessssstttt!!!!" shot the video, which runs about a minute in length and has over 27 hits on YouTube.
"We're not exactly rich," said Jenkins. "I was injured in a car accident last month, so I can't work. My wife's working 12 hour shifts at the hammer factory, and we still barely make rent. It'd be safe to say that a fine now would ruin the Jenkins clan."
Stern couldn't be reached for a reply but issued a short statement through his publicist, Cruella DeVille. "Yes! Yes!" the statement said. "Fine them all!"
When asked what she thought of Stern's hard-line stance on such matters, the baby in question chased after a butterfly and fell down.