Al Qaeda are planning to blow up the World Cup, but one of their terrorists decided to "move the goalposts" and now they've decided to blow up Wimbledon instead, damn Cads!
The supposed reason for this proposed attack was that the Danish and Dutch are participating and they felt that they had no right to after insulting the "Mighty One" and his Prophets.
The real reason though is that Al Qaeda were not allowed to qualify with their team and their manager, Bin "The Chosen One" Laden was aggrieved:
"Fucking Infidels FIFA and those forked tongued sons of Satan the US, it's a plot to insult the great Al Qaeda soccer team!" he bemoaned.
Unfortunately for Bin and his suicide terrorists the plans have been made public so now he's decided to concentrate on bombing that other great imperialistic show of decadence and sporting prowess, Wimbledon.
Bin was so pissed off that women Muslim players were banned from playing in their Burka's that he decided to target the place with suicide bombers disguised as ball-boys!
It's a relief that the World Cup is now out of danger and Al Qaeda are concentrating on blowing up Wimbledon at least we are sure that nobody will attempt to stop England becoming the new world champions (just joking!)