After 93 minutes of boredom, ineptitude and misery, God, watching from his lofty heights in his VIP, SKY box, decided enough is enough!
A miracle over the sunny Manchester skies happened yesterday as a fiery bolt from heaven struck and gave everybody in blue a slight heavenly hangover.
God tolerates hypocritical footballers crossing themselves and staring up to the heavens for "Heavenly assistance", no problem, but his tolerance was at an end yesterday so he decided to intervene.
This "divine ntervention" was only recognised by the TRUE BELIEVERS (United fans since 1957, an exclusive, rare, religious sect similair to the Freemasons, living underground and singing Cantona songs) witnessed a "RED HEADED DEMON" appear, nod the ball in the only corner possible and put an end to the misery!
There is no doubt God is a United fan and could not tolerate the incompetence of his fading superstars being beaten by Bayern Munich and Chelsea and pathetically drawing against Blackburn Rovers.
The "RED HEADED DEMON" and saviour was certainly a "divine intervention" and proof to all other footy clubs on the planet, United may be down on their knees but when it comes to having a number one fan, there is no one better that the almighty himself, AMEN!
PS: A reminder to Chelsea, Man City, Real Madrid, etc, he's not for sale!