Written by Skoob1999
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Saturday, 27 March 2010

image for Burnley Vow To Bounce Back Bigger And Better Than Ever
Listening To The Clarets Match Report In Sunnier Climes

The lads and lasses of Burnley are facing up to Premier League relegation with a smile on their faces and a spring in their step, pleased that their club made it to the big time and gave it their best shot.

It hasn't all been doom and gloom for Clarets fans - they beat champions Man United at Turf Moor - but many feel that the club weren't quite ready for promotion just yet, and that the club need a season or two in the Championship in order to consolidate their position.

There remains no doubt among spunky Clarets fans that if Burnley are relegated, they'll be back before long - and they'll be back bigger and better than ever.

Indeed, plans are already afoot to paint proper lines on the car park, mend the broken windows, and put the pie concessions out for the highest bidder with a view to providing the widest range of pies in English football.

The Clarets recently invested in a new team bus, after the old one was criticised for being too cramped. Burnley FC are also committed to improving the quality of football in East Lancs by slipping poison into Blackburn's water supply.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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