Written by SpoofyDoofy
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Saturday, 9 January 2010

image for Sir Alex Ferguson to become a Premiership Referee on his 'retirement' as Man Utd Manager!
Sir Alex Ferguson, will be as fit as a butcher's dog!

Old Trafford: Sir Alex Ferguson, the Manchester United manager, who has been putting himself in the firing line of the FA's disciplinary committee by criticizing the performance of match referees, is now destined to become one himself. Sir Alex is going to hang up his 'threads' of chewing gum for the whistle of a Referee.

Sir Alex Ferguson's recent 'outburst' at match referee Mark Clattenburg, was the last straw. Sir Alex Ferguson's comments at the time were hard hitting.

Sir Alex, "I've not seen a softer sending-off for a long time. It's absolutely ridiculous, really. I've been watching Mark Clattenburg this season. He did the Arsenal-Tottenham game - you had to have someone hit with an axe before he'd book anyone in that game, and he sends a player off here.

"There were some wonderful and weird decisions out there. The linesman gives offside for our goal - it's an own goal, and he gives offside! Anyway, we carry on."

Sir Alex Ferguson, post-match comments questioned the referee Alan Wiley's fitness during the 2-2 draw with Sunderland at Old Trafford on the 3 October 2009.

Sir Alex, "He was not fit enough for a game of that standard," Ferguson said after the game. "The pace of the game demanded a referee who was fit. It is an indictment of our game. You see referees abroad who are as fit as butcher's dogs. He was taking 30 seconds to book a player. It was ridiculous."

So now Sir Alex is going to get as fit as a 'butcher's dog' and give a 'regulatory' 15 minutes extra time for each half. Sir Alex is also going to get a new watch, courtesy of Mark Clattenburg and Alan Wiley, who are both reportedly looking forward to watching Sir Alex Ferguson, joining the Association of Match Referees Butcher's Dogsā€¦

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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