Britain celebrated today as its golden boy of motor racing, Jenson Button 29 thrashed Johnny Foreigner in a rain lashed FIA Scalextric World Championship.
Button was said to be 'chuffed to f**k' at yesterdays result in the decisive round at the Interlagos circuit outside Much Revving in the Marsh, Gloucestershire, when he took the Brawn-Mercedes team to a safe 5th place that assured him of the title.
"I am the champion." He repeated over and over, until fellow Brit, the diminutive Lewis 'Zippy' Hamilton, was forced to chin him as they celebrated by showering ecstatic spectators with Tizer.
"Congratulations to Jenson." said Hamilton. "But it's mine in 2010." Yeah, right!
Ex driver and mediocre television commentator, David Coulthard, gave our reporter a lap by lap account of yesterday's thrilling race, but was drowned out by an overjoyed Button doing 'donuts' in parc ferme.
"I always wanted to do that." said a sobbing Coulthard. "but it's too late now, too late."