Mega bucks football club Notts County have signed David Beckham's beard in a bid to reach the premiership. Following the recent Sol Campbell fiasco the club have been looking for a big name signing. Beckham's beard could prove to be the perfect signing.
"He looks in good trim" said Sex Go On Ericsson, former England boss and current Director of Football at Notts County. "Such a beard is bound to give this club the edge. The place is bristling with excitement at the prospect of seeing David's beard. There hasn't been such an atmosphere here since we signed Sol Campbell from his psychiatrist's couch."
Beckham's beard is expected to be named captain immediately in a bid to inspire the rest of the squad. The club shop is doing a brisk trade in false Beckham beards. "We've sold 8 already" said Doris Pimple.
Beckham's beard may not be the last big signing by Notts County. Talks are underway with David Seaman's ponytail and Paul Gascoigne's fake breasts. More transfer news to follow.