Written by Jalapenoman
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Monday, 21 September 2009

image for Tony Romo Breaks NFL Records in New Cowboy Stadium Debut
Jessica Simpson was the only Romo ex not at the game.

The Dallas Cowboys officially opened their new stadium to the public in a Sunday Night NFL game against division rival The New York Giants. The new $1.15 billion dollar sports complex is the most expensive ever built and the crowd for the opening (over 105,000) was the largest to ever see a regular season NFL game.

Cowboy quarterback Tony Romo broke in the new stadium by breaking and setting several NFL records:

  • Most interceptions thrown in a stadium costing over a billion dollars
  • Most interceptions thrown in a game attended by more than 105,000 people.
  • Largest number of ex-girlfriends and women he's previously dated and/or dating to attend an NFL game (105,000).
  • Highest choke percentage of any Cowboy quarterback to have ever thrown a pass in a stadium costing over a billion dollars.

Note: It was theorized that the only people in the stands who have not dated Tony Romo were former President George W. Bush, retired NFL coach John Madden, and former New York Mayor Rudy Guiliani (though Dubya was a former cheerleader, so that remains questionable).

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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