Doctors at the centre of the South African Hermaphrodite case have revealed another twist in the already-boring tale of Caster Semenya, the 800m runner who is 'a bit of both' - she's up the duff!
Semenya, 18, is expecting a child after penetrating herself with her own penis, and going at it 'hammer and tongs' in July. Doctors say they already know the sex of the tiny baby: a hermaphrodite.
For many centuries, it was thought that hermaphrodites only existed in fairy tales, but a recent study into fairy tales found that they were shit.
Hermaphrodites often continue the tradition of hermaphroditary in their line, both fathering and giving birth to their own children, therefore becoming both parents at once. Hermaphrodite mums and dads, being a 'single-entity parent', never quarrel with each other over their children, and hermaphrodite marriages are always a success with no known divorces.
Semenya, herself, told reporters:
"I should have used a condom!"