Written by Monkey Woods
Print this

Friday, 7 August 2009

image for Phil Brown Happy To Have Signed SOMEONE!
You busy, mate? Can y' come an' play for City?

Hull City manager Phil Brown today unveiled his two new 'star' signings at a Press conference at the KC Stadium, and confessed he was just pleased that he had managed to sign somebody, anybody, regardless of their skill or potential - or lack of it!

The Tigers completed the signing of Stoke City's Nigerian international midfielder Seyi Olofinjana for £3m, and United States international Jozy Altidore on a season-long loan from Villarreal.

Other City targets that 'got away' were Michael Owen, Bobby Zamora, Fraizer Campbell, Marc-Antoine Fortune, Jerome Thomas, Daryl Murphy, Ross McCormack, Cristiano Ronaldo and Carlos Tevez, leading the beleaguered Hull boss to tell his lovely wife, Karen, last week:

"Am gutted, love. No bastard wants to come. Al be glad to sign any bastard!"

Today, the chirpy South Shields idiot got his wish as the two 'any bastards' joined the Tigers brave fight against almost-certain relegation to the Championship.

I hope I'm wrong, but I don't think I am.

Make Monkey Woods's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 multiplied by 5?

5 3 6 10
49 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more