Juneau-her, Alas!-ka - (Rotters): Willow Palin has sent Paris Jackson a sweet message of condolence after seeing her very under-rehearsed primetime coast-to-toast (sick!) debut performance on TV yesterday.
The fourteen year old commiserated with Jackson, 11, on the burdens of having siblings "with daftass names like Blanket!"
"Sure, my brothers' and sisters' names are bad enough, of course.
"Like Track, Trig and Piper Alpha. Pretty dumb, huh?
"Still, at least you don't have a screaming oozing diaper-butt of a nephew called Trip - as in acid trip...or ego trip, haha."
Willow also invited Paris to come and stay at the Palin family home in Alaska during the holidays.
"I've got this wow! secret friend in Matanuska who does great home hydroponics. Guaranteed to get your head on straight!"
Prince Michael Jackson and his brother aren't invited.