England cricket ace Freddie Flintstone may be drinking in the last chance saloon. That is the verdict of former Yorkshire and England legend Geoff Boring. "Flintstone has clearly got a problem. He is so popular that whenever he goes into a bar people buy him drinks. I never had that problem."
Flintstone missed a bus trip to Ypres and it is believed that this was due to enjoying himself too much in the hotel bar the night before. England captain Andy Mouse refused to comment on the matter. KP Nuts, star batsman, said "If you want to know what I think you need to read my column in the Scum. Otherwise it's £5000 for an interview".
The England team could do without the controversy as they prepare for the Ashes. The trip to the WW1 war memorials was hoped to have a bonding effect. However far more bonding was achieved in the hotel bar. Some are suggesting that Flintstone is no longer interested in playing for England as he can make more money in the Indian Plenty Plenty league. And spend more time in the bar.
Flintstone rejects these claims. "I am totally committed to playing for England. For at least the first day. After that it's business as usual and my services to the highest bidder".
Latest score: War declared, England 880,000 dead for 1 pointless effort.