Written by Vanj China
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Tuesday, 16 June 2009

Barcelona FC president, Joan Laporta, continues to be dazed and confused over the recent player acquisitions of perennial archrival Real Madrid.

Over the weekend, Laporta was seen at the Montmeló race circuit witnessing how staunch Barça supporter and MotoGP racer, Jorge Lorenzo, lost to Valentino Rossi on the last curve of the last lap. Laporta must have seen it as an omen of things to come.

Shortly thereafter, the persistent president was seen huffing and puffing on some funny looking cigarettes to calm his nerves before his scheduled press conference to decry Real's strategy which is unecessarily inflating player values.

However, as the president was headed to the press center, a fan was heard to shout, "La porta! La porta!" Joan turned to acknowledge the fan but instead walked straight into the press center door the fan tried to warn him about.

Aside from ridiculing himself, Laporta ended up with a nasty shiner. A firm supporter of the Catalan dialect, 'la porta' meaning 'the door', el presi later admitted he just wanted to acknowledge the well wisher.

By the way, has anybody told the president he has a girl's first name?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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