(Corridors of Power, Westminster) After a late meeting in the House of Commons last night, Prime Minister Gordon Brown had good news for the nation this morning when he announced that the £80million received by Manchester United for their star winger Cristiano Ronaldo, will be confiscated in order to help shore-up Britain's flagging economy.
Britain is enduring its worse financial crisis since the last one, and according to Mr Brown, the Ronaldo cash "will come in extremely handy".
Just this week, Lloyds have decided to close all 1600 of its Cheltenham & Gloucester Building Societies, and workers at LDV were also told they had lost their jobs. Meanwhile, football clubs are 'bucking the trend' by laying out disproportionate amounts of money in, what is essentially, the entertainment business.
Mr Brown said the £80million would be used to bail out some of the Labour MPs who still owed money after the recent expenses revelations.