Written by Collins_and_Dutton
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Monday, 4 May 2009

Reports are indicating that Newcastle temporary manager Alan "Niceguy" Shearer has already handed out some notable punishment to Joey Barton following his sending off against Liverpool.

It is an interesting turn of events, as given his nice guy image, a number of people questioned whether he would have the right mindset to discipline any layers should the need arise.

Shearer appears to have refused to let Barton join in the Cluedo tournament held on the team bus on the journey back to Newcastle. Mark Viduka went on to win the tournament.

Furthermore he insisted that Barton should not receive a meal on the journey, forcing him to miss out on the Pasta Keegan which the rest of the team enjoyed.

Finally, it appears that on returning to St James Park, the furious Shearer took Barton's kit bag from the bus and ran off into the distance with it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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