Written by Shaworth
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Tuesday, 21 April 2009

image for Manchester United player to appear in TV's Rogue Traders
Harry Redknapps Grannie in training yesterday

Manchester United forward Dimitar Berbatov is appearing in BBC television program "Rogue Traders" tonight at eight thirty. Berbatov was followed for over two weeks by the shows presenters Matt Allwright an investigative journalist, and his side-kick, 6'4" Dan Penteado.

The pair secretly filmed Berbatov trying to pass himself off as a professional footballer. Berbatov, who ludicrously claims on his CV to be a "Bulgarian International", was filmed by the TV show aimlessly ambling around the football pitch looking lost and forlorn and visibly sweating.

The show claim to have footage of an amazing Berbatov penalty kick which dribbled slowly along the pitch towards into the waiting arms of a grateful Tim Howard, to which Harry Redknapp said "My Grannie would have done better".

Dimitar Berbatov is thought to actually be Lorenz Ingnatious, a Slovakian Plumber who first featured in Rogue Traders in July 2007 when he completely replaced a perfectly good central heating boiler, took five weeks to install it, completely botched the job causing the shows resident expert Jim Davies to say "My Grannie could have done better", and yet charged a disabled old lady from Swindon £30 Million for the job.

The TV program reported the imposter to the Manchester United organisation, but incredibly Manager Sir Alex Ferguson came out in defense of Berbatov saying "He will get criticism because when you pay £30million for a player everyone thinks he should be able to play," said Ferguson. "He is upset and disappointed, as we all were when he actually took to the pitch. "He has missed a few games and overall yesterday, I thought he did really well.".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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