New York Yankees fans were shocked today when the club announced that it has decided to play no more games in the "clearly cursed" new Yankee stadium.
Following the loss of the first ever game played in the stadium to the Cleveland Indians, a spokesman for the club said "This isn't the house that Ruth built. We have a 100% losing record in this stadium. We tried something new, but it hasn't worked. We now need to move to Plan B".
It appears "Plan B" is a separately, secretly constructed 70,000 seat stadium 18 miles from the new stadium. Having been constructed under the guise of a new Starbucks (which apparently no locals questioned the size of), the alternate stadium will be used as the actual stadium from now on.
It is unknown whether there is a Plan C but it has been commented that an abnormally large Pizza Hut is under construction 16 miles from the location.