Tennis number one Rafa Nadal is to launch his own brand of underwear, The Spoof.com can reveal. Under the brandname Wedgie Pants, the pants are to be sold at all the biggest outlets in the world and sales are expected to skyrocket.
'They'll come in a range of colours", divulges chief marketing consultant Buck Fastaspotte. "They're going to be extremely tight-fitting and get stuck in your ass crack like a g-string. It's a g-string but it's not a g-string-that's the motto behind the advertising campaign and that's the beauty of it. Men can now enjoy the advantages of the g-string without feeling totally gay."
Nadal is to mark the occasion by modeling the underwear himself at Wimbledon this year, wearing nothing else.
"It's a dream, no? At Wimbledon to play in Wedgie Pants, the pants that let you pick your ass all day without an excuse, no? It's a dream come true. Thank God this day has come, no? Thanks e'erybody."
"And you know what else is great about Wedgie Pants?", continues Buck Fastaspotte. "With every pair you purchase you get a free roll of toilet paper! So what are you waiting for?"
"My money, no?"
"Be quiet Rafa. I said you'd get it, just be patient! WEDGIE PANTS ...AT A STORE NEAR YOU!"