Written by Mister Meaner
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Wednesday, 4 March 2009

image for Sri Lanka Bus Driver Was None Other Than Hero Pilot Chesley Sullenberger
The driver of the bus

The hero of yesterday's Pakistan terrorist attack on the Sri Lankan cricket team in Lahore was revealed to the public this morning just hours after the incident, and turned out to be none other than miracle airline pilot, Chesley Sullenberger!

Sullenberger was at the controls of the US Airways Airbus that crash-landed into the Hudson River in New York last month, saving all 155 passengers and crew. He received the Blue Max for his bravery, but has since laid low to avoid the limelight.

He was on song again yesterday though, when driving the bus that was taking the Sri Lankans to the stadium for the First Test match with Pakistan. As the vehicle drove through Liberty Square on the way to the Gaddafi Stadium, it came under rocket attack from at least twelve terrorists.

Through a hail of bullets, Kapitan Sullenberger told everyone to stay calm as he guided the bus to safety, before taking on several of the suspects single-handedly - at one point even stopping to pick up and disarm a hand grenade.

Sri Lankan wicketkeeper Kumar Sangakkara was full of praise for the pilot/driver, saying:

"It was a bloody miracle! He's a bloody superman! Bloody hell and blimey!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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