Written by tennisman
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Sunday, 8 February 2009

image for Damien Duff Regains the Use of His Legs
Afflicted footballers at a 'balance therapy' workshop

Following last weeks disturbing revelation that the Newcastle star has become the latest Premier league player to develop 'collapsing leg syndrome' (or CLS as it is now being called in Physiotherapist' surgeries across the nation), fans and Physios alike breathed a sigh of relief as Duff swerved past at least 2 Albion defenders inside the penalty area today, retained his balance and stayed on his feet!

Karl Lowenbrau, the Austrian Professor of Human Movement and Strong Lager Drinking who discovered CLS and is working with the British Diving Association to develop preventative methodologies for Club coaching staff said 'I'm very relieved for Herr Duff. He seems like such a nice boy'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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