Written by queen mudder
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Monday, 2 February 2009

image for Michael Phelps in $10 million Twizla+ sponsorship
"Your mission, Mr Phelps - should you decide to accept it - .....

America - (Bong-Hits-4-Gold! Mess): Eight times Olympic gold medal winning US swimmer Michael Phelps is to smoke weed for the nation after accepting a $10 million sponsorship deal from cigarette paper manufacturers Twizla+ Jumbos.

The announcement comes as a new promo picture of a grinning Phelps, 23, 'smoking from a bong' suddenly appeared on Kellogs Cornfakes (sic) packets on breakfast tables across the USA.

An International World Anti-Doping Agency spokesman said today:

"WTF?

"Like, er,.. it's not like weed is a performance enhancing substance, man.

"Chill!"

Twizla+ Jumbo Marketing meanwhile is said to be thrilled and may be expanding its promo solutions to other celebs.

The campaign is already head hunting President Barack Obama's 26 year-old half brother George after his headline grabbing smoking foray in Nairobi over the weekend.

Michelle Obama is a Matanuska Thunderfuck aficionado by preference.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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