Written by Monkey Woods
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Sunday, 25 January 2009

image for Millwall Fans Say Seats At Hull Were "Jolly Uncomfortable"
She's sat on a few seats in her time

Millwall 'football fans' who ripped out and threw seats at Hull City supporters during yesterday's FA Cup fourth round tie at the KC Stadium, have said they did so because the seats in question were "jolly uncomfortable".

The fans responsible are suspected of being members of the club's infamous F-Troop, who terrorised supporters of teams up and down the country in the 1970s and 80s, but CCTV footage of the incident has proved useless.

The police hold hundreds of identikit photographs of Millwall fans from the 70s and 80s, but say the troublecausers at Hull looked such a motley bunch of sixtysomething old men, that identification would be impossible.

Several Lions fans claimed on the BBC 606 website that the seats at the KC were the least comfortable seats they'd ever thrown..

One fan who had been sitting 'near' the trouble, said:

"I 'eard 'em sayin it weren't very comfy on the bum. Then they started frowin wotsit, the chairs at the 'Ull fans."

Another, Daniel Baker, told us:

"Bleedin nuisance! They was aggravatin me piles!"

But City supporter Gladys Mickle, 92, laughed at the suggestion, saying:

"Ar sit on them seats week-in, week-out. Thuras comfy as mar settee. Them Millwall fans araloada wankers!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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